It’s been 2 months since I’ve posted anything, I actually had to look it up. I haven’t checked stats or anything. I’ve stayed away. Not just from this blog but from choices I had made to get and stay healthy. I had a lot of excuses: surgery, injury, being drained by family and the holidays, or just not feeling it. I’d get back on the treadmill every once in a while and lift weights when I felt like it but I’ve fallen. Food became a crutch for pain and for emptiness that I was feeling. I didn’t have a reason to and I just didn’t care, again. Out of the near 60 lbs I lost I gained nearly 30lbs back. A set back for sure. But I’m done with it now and for several reasons.
I am healthy. Over the last 2 weeks I’ve been getting back into my routine and I’m reminded of how strong and healthy I am. I still can sprint @ 10mph for 1 minute. I can run long distances, push myself just as hard as ever with my circuit training and I can feel that muscle is still there that took months to develop. I am healthy and I never want to lose that.
I want to be comfortable again. Clothes feel much tighter, obviously, and I had to dig out some of my old clothes. Not all of them, just a couple. I saw some pictures this morning of me from this weekend and I got really angry. I thought I had put that guy away. Time to lock him away for good.
My sister is a freak. She really is. 2 weeks ago she had the nerve to challenge me to run a half marathon with her on May 22 and I lost my mind and said ‘yes’. I know I can do 13.1 miles. Note the word ‘do’. I’ve always said I didn’t want to race because I didn’t want to run for that reason. I told myself and everyone around me that I wanted to run just for the fun of it and to get healthy. But honestly I was scared. I was scared to fail. I don’t know where that fear is coming from, it affects me in more than just the area of running but I need to address it, know it, and run past it. Pun intended. So I’m running again and working on getting faster. On Sunday I bought the most expensive pair of running shoes I have ever spent money on and they have felt great. I’m ready to push myself for distance and speed. I may be crawling at the end of that 13.1 miles but I will have given it my best on that day and all the days leading to it.
The last straw. While I’ve been keeping up with reading the posts of people still on their journey I was pretty determined not to do any more posts. I didn’t feel like writing and I didn’t see the need. I do see the need now. I checked on the blogs this morning and saw that Beej had made mention of me, that I had an impact on him. Did I really? Did I inspire someone? So I do this for me. To talk things out, to be open/exposed, and listen to suggestions. I do need to continue to write because it’s healthy for me to do.
So that’s where I’m at. Today I killed it on sprints in the morning and finally made the time to do an evening circuit training from which I almost died from. We’re having wonderful weather up here in the frozen north so I’m going to spend some time the nights I’m not circuit training to be outside and cut some brush down to get ready for summer projects. We will have grass this year, we will have grass. Thanks for everyone’s thoughts and concerns. You’ll be hearing from me very soon.
It’s been a while. Life seems a little bit better and I’m taking the right steps in my weight loss. I’m back to a consistent basis on the treadmill, although not to where I was before. I changed up my sprints more for time than for speed as the speed was leading to a quicker end to our treadmill. Yesterday I was able to have a rotation of 2 min @ 7mph, 1 min @ 5.5mph, and then 1 min of 3mph. Not too bad. It’s paying off too in a couple of ways. First I had a health assessment and all my blood levels are great. The only thing that was on the bad was my weight. Second was playing basketball last night. I used to play in high school but that was 20 years ago. It’s a group of techs at work that get together every Tuesday during the winter and I was very nervous. I’ve got no offense but I can set picks, play defense and make a good pass once in a while. Another thing, I can run. I run the court better now than I did 20 years ago. Now my ankles were letting me know this morning I’m not the young man I once was. But I was so charged last night when I got home to know I could run with the young boys and I plan on adding this to my routine, as well as the following morning’s walk to loosen up the ankles after barely getting to the bathroom this morning.
It’s good to have new stuff to do. The exercise bike is gone now, taken back by my brother and his wife. So I’m learning new stuff to keep active. Life is so busy right now so it’s been really important for me to establish my morning exercise pattern.
As far as this blog, I’m not so sure. Maybe I’ll get back to a once a week update just to keep myself honest. This is my blog, for me, and while I know I don’t want it to get repetitive for me, I still understand how important it is to keep an accountability journal of what’s going on. That’s the plan for now.
Time to go for another walk to loosen up the ankles.
Well, to respond to RobFitness, I overdid it. That 3 mile run has been hurting me the last 2 days. Yesterday my thighs were tight and it was hard to walk. This morning I woke up at 5, not by the alarm clock, but by my calves cramping up. That cramp stayed with me for the first half of the day and I can still feel it. It’s really strange. I have muscle. I can feel it. When I was running I knew I had the strength to keep running. Apparently it was too much to start out with. I do not like this at all. It’s hard to take it easy when I know what I can do. I can’t even get on the exercise bike without trying to push harder and harder. Tonight I drove my dad’s pickup that I borrowed back to his farm and walked the 3/4 mile way home. It felt good just to stretch it out and hopefully I can do more tomorrow.
Eating is still a struggle and I have no reason why it is. I’m not binging and not going out to eat. It’s snacking that’s my problem. I’m going to not buy some of the little treats that I usually do to avoid going over what is a good portion size.
Everything else is going pretty good but my writing sucks. I don’t want to classify this as a funk but I will attribute a lack of excitement in looking at anything right now. The most exciting thing is playing with the Zune software. It’s like ITunes but better. I may need to get out from listening to podcasts and go back to some music for a while to bring me back.
The busyness of life has me running in circles but I’m so grateful to be healthy enough, strong enough, pain-free enough to keep up with everything. Yesterday we finally signed the closing papers for our house. We still have to do some navigating around to pay off 3 contractors but that should be done soon and we won’t be paying ‘rent’ on this place anymore. While it feels good it’s hard to celebrate. First, it’s hard to celebrate without my wife’s parents being here. They have been such a key part to us building this house, we owe them so much because of their support and very grateful to have them as part of our family. Second, I don’t know but the house doesn’t seem as important as having the family together and appreciating each other. We’ve come closer together within this last month, this last year as we’ve gone through some stressful times and watching the kids grow. This house, while an awesome house, is just not that important. It’s family. It’s my ideal of family that is driving me right now and there is definitely a peace about that.
No exercise on Monday. Fighting off a cold and just tired. Some is physically tired but another part is being emotionally tired. I want to say I need to get in the right mindset to get back into working out but that’s wrong. I just need to start doing it. Get back on the horse before the horse takes off with the wagon that got me here. I love mixing metaphors. It starts tonight.
And a good day. Today was the first day since the surgery that I went a day without pain medication. I do not like pain medication. I don’t like feeling in control and all the other stuff that comes with it. Yesterday I took the new medication and while it did suppress the pain, by 2 in the afternoon I was so dizzy that I had to go home for the day. The pain wasn’t so bad today and what a difference to feel more in control. I’m getting better but promise to take it easy getting back into my routine.
I miss my routine. My body misses my routine. I was feeling bad this week about how the pound piled on this week. Several reasons. No exercise, especially hurts compared to how much exercise I was doing before. Metabolism slowed way down. And then I ate quite a bit more. The one thing about the medication is that it dulled the pain but it was still there. In the evening I would not take any medicine because I can’t go to bed with that foggy feeling but to take my mind of the pain, I would eat. Nothing like I used to, but more than I’m used to. Another big reason that I just found out about today was that both medications I have been taking can cause constipation. And boy, did the cucumber I had at work this morning take care of that. This morning when I weighed myself I had gained 9 lbs over the week. Unbelievable. We’ll see what I weigh tomorrow morning after today’s cleansing but I’m debating whether to include this weight in my charts. I know I’ll lose it in no time, there’s just something holding me back from documenting it. Thoughts?
I’ve already passed out once from the pain. Surgery went a little longer than scheduled and it was pretty painful. The medicine wore out and they still were not halfway done. Myself and the doctor had to wait 20 minutes there until the medicine kicked back in. I’m glad I only have to do this once. When I passed out I was just standing up reading a post on Facebook of a friend who got fired today. The next thing I know I’m doing a faceplant right into the wall. I don’t remember anything happening. All of a sudden my forehead is dragging down the wall in front of me. I’m confined to the couch for a long time now.
Today weigh in was just what I wanted, 1 pound. This way I don’t have to proclaim 60 only to fall back a week later. Today before the surgery, when I got weighed in, we looked at how much I weighed when I was in last 9 months ago. 282. At least I reached the 60 pound mark in some way. I’m very happy with how my body is changing. I love how t-shirts and jeans fit and how they look. Other people have noticed, getting more compliments and that is something I am grateful for.
Time to lay down. Have a great weekend.
Just got back from a long weekend in Omaha and a wonderful weekend it was. My sister and husband are a great couple to hang out with. We did some stuff with the kids and stuff together but still had moments to rest and relax. They took us out to an amazing Spanish (not Mexican) restaurant and that presented new flavors I had never tasted. So good, especially the lamb. You order about 3 things per person and then everyone gets to sample something off each plate. Sooo good.
I actually got some exercise in over the weekend. Really good exercise. On Saturday my sister brought me to the AF base’s workout hanger. It was like a huge workout center with everything one could want. I first ran a mile on the indoor cushioned track. Then I spent some time on the weight machines working my abs, upper arms and chest. Then I spent 25 minutes on a stair climber and then 15 on a rowing machine. I capped it off with another 1 mile run on the track and then 50 ab crunches. A hour and a half workout, no air-conditioning, and I loved it. Sunday I went for a 5.5 – 6 mile run on a trail. It’s a bit warmer down there so I was working hard but missing my heart rate monitor. I hit the same trail this morning and found a spot to do my sprints. But I could only do 6. It’s a concrete trail with no side track and my left ankle is feeling it pretty good right now. Even though the gravel wears my shoes out faster it is so much easier on the joints, I just never knew it before.
Eating was pretty good, my sister and her husband know how to cook and eat right. My brother-in-law is a great cook and we had the best pork chops off the grill yesterday. There were a couple exceptions that were made over the weekend. Yesterday it was a sandwich at Jimmy Johns that wasn’t the greatest for the diet and today we ate at McD’s on the way back today as I had an Angus burger that I wanted to try (not that good at all) and then shared my fries with the whole family.
So a very good weekend indeed and looking forward to getting back into the swing of things this week before a not so fun time on Friday. This is going to be one interesting month.